Until sometime last year, I had no idea that I am what one would call an introvert. I tend to space out my social interaction, even with my close friends. I’m always there when a friend needs me, I feel it is absolutely my job to lend a shoulder or a hand to my friends. Unless needed, I resign myself to my daily tasks around the home, tending to my little beauties and cleaning up or my crafts. Besides my husband and my mother, even my best friends only hear from me every other week or more and thankfully, one of them is also an introvert so she completely understands. Many people have no idea that I am this way because I can be so talkative once I’m comfortable. I’m prone to social anxiety and I do tend to bail on big get-togethers or those that involve new people (sorry!) I’m known for being a little weird and awkward but I’m okay with that, it’s all just part of my personality!
At the same time, I enjoy making new friends and developing very close friendships from them. This personality trait can make it tough to get out there and meet people and being a mom, I think it’s just difficult to meet people in general. In public, the only people who talk to me are the ones telling me that I have my hands full. Then, there are the kids who are playing nicely at the park with my kids so I’ve tried twice to take that leap that makes me feel like a kid again and asked, “Hi, want to be my friend?” I also tried giving out a business card with my playgroup’s information and my own on the back (similar to a mommy business card) and I was looked at like I have three heads.
I eventually solved this problem when I stumbled upon some international clubs for moms and let me share for those of you who may not know:
Meetup is a good site for finding local groups. Usually there is a small fee, a few dollars, because the site charges a group for joining and then the members will split the fee.
MOMS Club is international and often there is a group nearby but if not, you can work with them to create your own. They do fundraisers, play dates, have branch off groups like crochet or couponing clubs, etc.
MOPS is an international organization geared towards Christian parenting, although I do have friends without a particular religion who were members and still really enjoyed it. MOPS meetings have childcare classes, usually set up by age, for your little ones and kick off with a prayer, potluck-style breakfast, and then a meeting which tends to involve a craft, speaker, video, and usually time for a chat session. In between meeting dates, MOPS usually has moms nights, playdates, and parents nights. I enjoyed the MOPS group where I used to live but the one where I live now has been even better with a lot of friendships forming for me as I get a chance to meet everyone when we mix up the tables every week with our cute little questions like: Which do you prefer to drink? Coffee go to this table, tea go to this, and other go to this. Each MOPS groups adds their own little touches of fun!
What about you? How do you make new friends?
I am an introvert as well and find it incredibly hard to make new friends. Online I am fine, I guess because I don’t have to look the person in the eye and find I don’t compare myself to them (they’re prettier than me, skinnier than me, blah blah blah). In ‘real life’ it takes me a while to warm up to someone new but when I do they are stuck with me for life… lol
If I haven’t know someone since childhood, the odds of us being friends is slim to none. For me, it’s tough to make friends because I’m not one of those people who throws that term around all willy nilly. It takes a lot for me to consider someone a friend.