Do you see that? The ultrasound tech pointed to something on the screen. “What? It’s a girl?” I asked, so used to hearing those words. I thought I saw something but I’d been wrong before so I didn’t want to assume anything.

“No,” she told me, “Look right there.” Slowly, she typed it. B-O-Y. The tears started flowing immediately and I asked her over and over again if she was sure, in a million different ways. “So you’re absolutely certain? How often have you been wrong? How accurate is it at this gestation?” I was only 15 weeks but it felt like forever waiting to find out who I was carrying around. Well, we know by now that it was you.

The minute you came out, I pulled you up to me and checked. “He’s definitely a boy!” I shouted, still in shock. This little man I dreamed of finally joined me in the world! I was so excited to put you in a tiny suit and to talk about my son. Actually, it was a while before I got into the habit of saying “my son” and “he”. Still, I remained ecstatic that I had a son when I never thought I would. I had always envisioned how things would be but you’re so much better than I could have even imagined.

When I say I love you in a crowded room, you’re the first to tell me you love me back. If I need snuggles, you’re in my lap before I can finish my sentence. You always ask me how you can help around the house and it never fails to make me smile to see how much you adore being a big brother. If your sister seems down, you try to cheer her up. That’s just who you are, the caring, adoring, sweet boy I hoped for.

Now, you’re leaving for kindergarten. The world gets to share in your love and kindness. I have so many hopes and dreams for you as you enter that big world out there. I hope that you will hold doors for people and that your smiling freckled face will bring them joy the joy it brings me. I hope that you will ask a lot of questions and collect all of the knowledge that you can, that you’ll have that zest for learning your parents have. I know that you will be respectful and considerate, helping your teachers and classmates when they’re in need.

As tears fill my eyes when I watch your tiny little feet step up onto the bus, please don’t think that I am sad. Someday you will realize how quickly it all goes by. You could once fit in the crook of just one arm and now, you’re carrying a tyrannosaurus backpack and trotting off with a big smile on your face. When the bus drives off with you waving at me, I can already see you in a limousine, freshly married with that same smile waving back.

I cry because I’m proud of you and what an amazing little man you’re turning into. I cry because I’m so happy to see you happy. My little boy is becoming a big boy and it’s a big deal! You are going to learn so much, join clubs and new hobbies, make friends and all kinds of choices. It’s a big world out there and I believe that you’re going to take it by storm. So off you go and I’ll be right here waiting for you, hoping that you’ll never tire of snuggles and love.